I could be wrong, but I have a sneaky feeling that this sheet of “made in China” Spongebob stickers we got at the dollar store is not an officially licensed Nickelodeon product:

Exhibit A — the oddly proportioned titular hero:

I would say this offers definitive proof that some sort of child labor law is being broken, and first graders are drawing these stickers by hand:

Squidward, from the rarely aired Simpsons crossover episode:

Despite the crude drawing, they still managed to convey Patrick’s tortured soul and suppressed homicidal rage:

This one erases any doubt as to these stickers country of origin:

Because “Happy Joy Luck Plane” wouldn’t fit.

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I’m sure most of you have been following the recent “lead paint on toys” stories and reports of other unsafe products that are making their way to the United States via China. And I think we can all agree that a bit more monitoring of the safety of imported goods needs to take place, especially when it comes to stuff for our kids. Well, Erin Burnett from CNBC thinks you’re an idiot. In a recent appearance on Hardball with Chris Matthews, Burnett scolds concerned parents demanding more stringent standards on Chinese goods to “be careful what they wish for.”

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I mean really, people, you want to cut into Wal-Mart’s profits just to keep your family safe? What the hell is the matter with you? Either this woman is completely insane or she just took the award away from Stephen Colbert for the best comedic deadpan delivery on the planet.

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