Your kid works hard, juggling hours of basketball practice with their school work, getting up early in the morning and coming home late at night. He showed the coach his dedication, and earned that spot on the varsity team. Then he went on to lead the team in scoring and rebounds. And what is his reward? No, not a starring role in High School Musical, instead, his natural ability is questioned and he’s tested for steroids:

The Illinois High School Association on Monday joined a small but growing number of states to implement mandatory random drug-testing for student-athletes. Its Board of Directors voted 10-0 to begin testing with the 2008-09 school year.

The timing was coincidental with two highly publicized incidents regarding drugs and sports. Last month the Mitchell report on the use of performance-enhancing substances in baseball included allegations Clemens, the seven-time Cy Young Award-winning pitcher, had taken steroids and human growth hormone.

Last week a U.S. District Court judge sentenced former Olympic track champion Jones to six months in prison in part for lying about her use of performance-enhancing drugs.

While at least a few dozen Illinois high schools have instituted drug-testing of athletes on their own in the last two decades, this is the first time the IHSA has mandated statewide testing. Few, if any, of the schools tested for steroids.

I’m what you might call a bit hard core when it comes to right-to-privacy issues, even when it comes to our kids’ schools. I don’t condone random locker searches, and I don’t condone random drug tests. I think it sends a horrible message to our children, that no matter how much they strive or how much they try and keep their noses clean, they will always be under suspicion. When I hear, “Well if they aren’t doing anything wrong, then they have nothing to worry about,” it makes me want to punch something. The fact that someone isn’t doing anything wrong means they should be free from being hassled.

Like I said, I’m a nut about such things, so maybe I’m being irrational — can anyone offer a little perspective? Is there any good reason why our school district should be conducting drug tests?

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A ticket.

Back in April of 2006, a Chicago suburban mother was charged with murder when she shook her 3 month old baby to death.

She pleaded out and was “punished” with a $500 ticket, 4 years of probation, 2 months of home confinement and free counseling. She had spent 127 days in jail after her arrest, but I have no doubt if this wasn’t an infant and it wasn’t her “possession”, people would be insulted by the lack of humanity in the message this sends. Cases like these send child advocacy back 500 years.

So, why don’t we just extend abortion rights until the end of the first year? What’s the difference? Why bother with the courts even pretending like this is a crime?

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Ah, the cell phone, the great diversion for fussy babies and cranky toddlers the world over. What parent hasn’t handed their tot the cell phone so they could do their grocery shopping or order a non-fat latte in peace? Heck, we even have made it habit of giving our old phones to the kids when we upgrade — there must be at least two or three Motorolas at the bottom of the toy box. Apparently that’s not such a hot idea — by law, the FCC requires that even deactivated phones still be able to reach 911 emergency services. Did you know that? I sure didn’t.

A 4-year-old in the Chicago suburbs found that out through trial and error, and was so delighted to have someone pick up on the other end that she called back — 287 times. The police were finally able to get the girl’s location when on the last call she indicated she was having a Big Mac Attack and they convinced her to give her address so they could deliver it. But instead of a Happy Meal the folks in blue brought a stern lecture for Mom.

I was really hoping they would have reported what kind of phone it was so I could go get one — the battery must have a hell of a long talk time.

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