Heard on the net: replacing broken toys
Posted
May 13, 2008 at
9:09 am by
Prescott
Writer James Lileks has come up with an interesting way of dealing with his daughter’s broken Nintendo:
(G)Nat dropped her Nintendo and it broke. This is a teachable moment, in which she learned an important lesson: don’t drop your Nintendo, or it will break. Also, a replacement is not immediately forthcoming. The world doesn’t work that way. Well, her world doesn’t work that way. I will not let her use savings to ut a new one, because she has no concept of money; I have told her she can wait three months, which is a mean cruel ETERNITY, but: she can hasten the day by spending Nintendo time on other things, such as reading and art. The more she does that, the faster Replacement Day comes.
I’ll admit, I may talk a good game but often I’m a total pushover. I have — on more than one occasion — immediately replaced a lost or broken toy (provided, of course, it was an accident and not due to carelessness). Even went so far that when a beloved stuffed animal went missing, I went on eBay and got into a bidding war to purchase a new one.
How do you handle such situations? Do you — finances permitting — buy a new one or do you turn it into a life lesson?
Tags: broken-toys, Heard on the Net, Parenting, spoiled-children |
9 Responses to “Heard on the net: replacing broken toys”
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1. Rita said:
May 13, 2008 @ 9:34 am
It depends on the situation and my mood about the whole thing. I clicked the link and couldn’t easily find out how old “Nat” is. Is she 5, is she 12, is she 16? I’d have a different reaction to the situation at each of those ages.
I’m all in favor of teaching kids personal responsibility and learning the value of patience and money. But, I’m also not the kind of parent who thinks that every God.Damned.Thing has to be a *~*~LEARNING OPPORTUNITY~*~* I think there needs to be a balance. Sometimes kids need to be treated with tough love to teach them right from wrong and instill those important life lessons and other times kids need to be unapologetically spoiled for absolutely no reason. But, that’s just me.
2. Prescott said:
May 13, 2008 @ 9:40 am
I believe she’s in 1st grade.
3. Rita said:
May 13, 2008 @ 10:04 am
[quote comment="163087"]I believe she’s in 1st grade.[/quote]
Eh, then, ME? I’d let her spend her savings to buy a new one. That was an option given in the original post. He said that he wasn’t going to let her use her savings to get one right away, but make her wait three months. I think that a 1st grader does have a concept of money. Unless she’s one of those kids who has a billion members of extended family who shower her with tons of cash each holiday and her savings account is bigger than mine. Then maybe not. Then maybe she can work to save up for half–take half from her enormous savings and earn the other half through allowance or extra chores or whatnot. Hell, take 3/4 of it from her savings and have her earn the other 1/4. 1st grade is still little.
They aren’t cheap and they aren’t a necessity. But, having her pay for the replacement seems to be a teachable enough lesson, IMO. Learning the concept of time will happen on its own. I don’t think it needs to be forced in this way. Kids learn through the natural way of life how to wait for things. I don’t think that instilling a specific time limit (3 months) for something like this is necessary at all. JMO.
Keeping in mind with all of this, of course, that I won’t let Katie have her own electronic entertainment device (purchased with her own savings) until she’s 10. Just because I hate those stupid things. So, I’ve got my own bad-assness going on here. But, since he seems to have no philosophical opposition to handheld electronics to begin with, I’d just let the kid buy herself a new one when she can.
4. Allison G. said:
May 13, 2008 @ 1:11 pm
I had exchanged a toy once because it was defective, but I used the words “Oh, well, we’ll just buy a new one.”
Big mistake. Now they expect that to be the norm.
So last month my 1st grader left his light saber and Darth Vader helmet in the backyard. I told him 3 times to pick it up, and I know he heard me. But the next morning, the dog had chewed it to pieces. “Oh, well Mom, we’ll just buy new ones.”
***head turning, eye twitching**** “Bull Shit on that! I am NOT buying you new ones! Now, when you and your friend play, he can use his light saber and you can use a freaking STICK!!!!!”
I would make the girl do extra chores and save up that ‘work money’ to buy a new one. Kids that age don’t get the concept of a savings account. It’s stuck in a bank and they never see it. If they work for it, they can save it in a jar and watch it grow, and actually get the idea that mom and dad have to save up for stuff like that, too.
5. Jennifer said:
May 13, 2008 @ 1:51 pm
I know from personal experience that most kids have NO concept of money at all. Most believe it grows on trees or that things don’t cost much. Last weekend, I was visiting my youngest brother at my parents house for his birthday. He’s 13! Well, one of my aunts called and asked him what he wanted for his birthday. He in return told her that he would like a Wii game. Apparently, Wii games cost over 50 bucks. My father infuriated with my brother told him to call his aunt back and say that he would want nothing for his birthday then a card for being so ill-considerate and ask for such a pricey gift. Thinking that this clicked in my 13 yr old brothers head that asking for such a pricey gift is not only selfish but very intolerant on his part. But only 2 hours later when my eldest brother took him out, he comes home with a Flyers Jersey and a new pair of Jordan sneakers. Thinking that the whole concept of money clicked into his brain, it clearly did not. He seemed remorseful and understanding but then went ahead and did the same thing that he was told not to do only a few hours later. So here is proof that a 13 yr old doesnt understand the concept of money and he was definitly not raised that way for me and his other siblings would never dare ask for a gift over $20.
I also know that kids will go into a store with their parents, pick up something they like and ask for it. Most parents of course look at the price and decide from there but MOST kids NEVER look at the price before asking. They merely dont understand the value of money, until its their own money. lol.
6. Rita said:
May 13, 2008 @ 3:08 pm
Wow, Jennifer, that whole scenario is just so foreign to me. I’m sure that there are kids like that around here, I’m just not in direct contact with any of them anymore.
My 13 y.o. knows how much things cost. He has an allowance (which he earns for chores he does) and he spends or saves it as he wants. He learned when he was younger, by making bad spending choices and suffering buyer’s remorse how to save his money for things he wants. It was never anything we pushed him into. He is aware of how much EVERYTHING costs and will often comment on the cost of clothing or food or whatever when we’re out shopping for things.
But, I’ve always taken my kids out shopping with me, and they’ve always been in control of their own money. They’d blow it on plastic trinkets and then regret it when something came along and they didn’t have money. At 9, my middle one is a decent saver, so when things come up that she wants to do or get. And even now, they’re learning the way of Ebay. They collect up their stuff sometimes (they initiate it), take pictures of it and ask dh to post stuff on Ebay on his account. Then when it sells, they get the money.
I’m sure there are kids out there with no sense of financial responsibility. When I used to work at the Scholastic Book Fairs at one of my son’s old schools, there would be kids, like 3′d and 4th graders who would come to pay for their books and when they opened their wallets, you could see MULTIPLE $20 bills. The parents would just hand them like sixty bucks to go spend on paperbacks and posters at the school book fair. The kids would just hand you the wad, too, for you to deal with. The total would be like $11, and they’d hand you the $60, just clueless about it all.
I don’t understand it. It’s not my world at all.
7. Kennedy said:
May 14, 2008 @ 2:09 pm
I think for me it would depend on the toy, and how it gets/got broken. If carelessness or on purpose absolutely not. If it was some beloved toy that just wore out, or accidentely broke, then maybe. Most kids now days have soooo many toys, in a few days they’d probably forget about it anyway, so why waste the money on a new one?
8. bms2000 said:
May 14, 2008 @ 5:00 pm
We are big do-it-yourselfers, and will do everything we can to fix a broken toy, or help the child fix his own toy. But if you broke it because you a)did not put it away when told or b)hurled it at your brother in a fit of pique, then tough toenails, kiddo.
9. stacy c said:
May 14, 2008 @ 5:10 pm
Her is the thing,ok 5 is to young to teach the concept of money,no wait 13 is to young then what is the right age.We wonder why as a nation we not only have kids going in college not knowing the first thing about finacial responsiblity but when they leave they are not in any better shape.Yes 5 is to young to sit down and do bills with so is 13 but really there are lots of other way to teach kids about making good finacial choices at 5 and 13 and a big ticket item is the perfect thing to do it with.
In this case I agree I do not know enough to say what I would do.If the child has more in her savings then I do mine then I agree having her work so part of the money is a good ideal,if she has saved for a while then I would let her spend it right away.If it takes up most of her saving then when she wants something in a week or two and doesn’t have the money then it will click for that child,a week or two late but it will click.