The lazy non practicing Christmas loving sometimes Catholic (but not really)
Posted
March 26, 2008 at
2:18 pm by
Tracy
I was raised as a lazy Catholic. Sure, I went to a preschool that was on Church property, and yes I went to Sunday school (until I was old enough to realize smoking pot and sneaking off to breakfast at Friendly’s was a better way to spend my time than learning about Jesus) and my family went to church…well, sometimes. I hated church because my mom would make me dress up…”GOD doesn’t care if I’m wearing jeans…” happened to me one of my favorite lines on Sunday mornings.
My fathers not religious and over the years God, Jesus, and Catholicism was never discussed in my family. Christmas, check. Precious Moments bible sold at family garage sale, check. I’m not sure what I believe; some days I like the idea of a big guy in the sky, some days I want to rub my little turquoise Buddha, and sometimes it’s a woman in the sky complete with sheer tunics and lavender essential oils. The bottom line: I believe in something, cause I wanna. Since having a daughter at least fourteen people have asked me if I’m going to baptize her and each time I just sort of glance wearily at my husband and go uh, no. As in, uh no I’m not going to pretend to be Catholic even if you want me to “do it for Great Gram…” No WAY.
But last night I found myself whispering to Paige my childhood mantra:
Now I lay me down to sleep, Pray the lord my soul to keep, Love stay with me Through the Night and Wake me By the Morning Light..
It sounds nice. It’s comforting, kinda. I might replace the Pray the Lord part with “Mommy Prays you sleep through the night…” Which has yet to happen, mother fuck! But seriously. I want Christmas and Easter but no bible. And I want spirituality but not Sunday school, and I want heaven but no sins that prevent you from getting in.
I’m confused. I’m confused about religion and spirituality and I don’t want to confuse Paige. Does she need to grow up with “something..” like the Grandparents are convinced or can we just enjoy comforting prayers before bed and presents on December 25th?
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12 Responses to “The lazy non practicing Christmas loving sometimes Catholic (but not really)”
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1. Colleen said:
April 9, 2008 @ 7:44 am | Quote
Practicing a religion is more than just praying to God and following some “rules.” By joining a church community you will find support and love. They will serve as an extended family especially if Gran dies, mom dies, and no one seems to give a bean.
While you may think you don’t need a church community, perhaps a chuch community needs you. Through faith-based communities the poor are fed and clothed, people are educated and comforted. If you join a church community you will be teaching your child how to serve and how to lead.
2. Rita. said:
April 9, 2008 @ 8:53 am | Quote
Huh. That’s kind of exactly the OPPOSITE of what I found in the last church community I joined. Really, as long as I was toiling aside them, volunteering for everything under the sun and pulling my weight, it was cool. But, once I was stricken with a physical problem and couldn’t keep up, I was tossed off to the side and forgotten about.
All church communities are not the same.
I’m a very religious person, but my last experience really turned me off on religious-based groups and communities and I really have zero interest in joining one again for the time being. And, when I do, it will be with caution.
I understand the whole concept of Christianity being a communal religion, but I just make my “community” the world I live in. I’m not evangelical, I’m not looking to convert anyone. I just practice the “Christian” lifestyle on my own, out in the world.
And, really, that’s what Jesus sent his disciples to do, He sent them off on their own to assist others (and spread His word, which I do, I guess, with my actions rather than my voice). He didn’t suggest they seclude themselves off on their own in a building to themselves and have outsiders come to THEM.
People have lots of options to give to their community outside of a church as well. There are many secular organizations that feed the hungry, clothe the naked and comfort the sick. I teach my kids how to serve and lead, just not within the confines of a church.
I know this is not what you intended your entry to be, Tracy, lol, but I couldn’t NOT respond to this.
My older kids were very involved in the (Catholic) church when they were younger, but as I started having those health problems, I took a big step back and was really hurt and angry over the whole thing. I have really big issues with the greater Roman Catholic Church anyway, so it wasn’t all that hard for me to leave. I do want my kids to grow up having a relationship with God, but I, like you, have been lazy with it.
I do intend to look into this Episcopalian church near us sometime in the future, maybe when the little one can sit still reliably, like in kindergarten? That’s my plan anyway.
3. IrishTeresa said:
April 9, 2008 @ 9:56 am | Quote
I firmly believe that everyone knew exactly what the Catholic Church stands for and offers, no one would EVER leave. It’s very hard to be a Catholic but it’s the absolute best part of my life. I am a happily married mother of 5, was a stay-at-home mom for 12 years and now work full-time at a great job with great people. My life is only complete because of being Catholic. I like to say (and pray to God that I would) die for my faith if I had to.
4. Rita. said:
April 9, 2008 @ 10:52 am | Quote
That’s really great for you! I really mean that. I do envy people who have found religious peace and are happy in their niche.
I converted to Catholicism as an adult, and I just see the bigger church as full of hypocrisy and misogyny. But, that’s just me! I just cannot get on board with the anti-birth control stuff, or the protection given to child abusing priests, or the whole annulment but not divorce thing. Plus there’s the issue of women not being allowed to be clergy and the idea that the Pope is infallible (when he speaks “from the chair”), but then that infallibility can be taken away in the future if it seems like he wasn’t really a good guy after all. They just make up the rules as they go along, just like everyone else, but since they’re HOLY they claim religious immunity. Which is…hypocrisy.
But, that’s just my opinion! And I know there are many brilliant, good people who are able to reconcile with the church and I don’t think less of them, I admire them for being able to find that peace in themselves. I can’t do it. I wish I could.
5. IrishTeresa said:
April 9, 2008 @ 11:12 am | Quote
Yeah, that’s the thing though, eh. If you purport to being Catholic then you must follow all the teachings of the Church even the ones you don’t agree with. Otherwise, you’re Catholic in name only (or as some would say, a cafeteria Catholic). The only way, truthfully, for anyone to come to that place is by asking for help from above. In other words a prayer could go something like this: “Lord, if you agree that the Catholic Church is the ONE, HOLY, APOSTOLIC, church then please help me to accept it and help my disbelief”. See what happens.
6. Colleen said:
April 9, 2008 @ 11:32 am | Quote
Rita,
I hope you are feeling better!
I completely understand having a church community turn on you. Been there, done that, have the DVD.
I wouldn’t say that was a Catholic thing. I’ve been a church cantor for many different religions. Some communities were better than others. I think that you are doing what you should - finding a community that supports you and helps you in your relationship with God.
7. Rita. said:
April 9, 2008 @ 2:53 pm | Quote
What’s funny about that is I actually DID that, and the answer I got was very much a sign that I needed to leave the church. That was two years ago Easter. Since then I have met with the priest and talked with other people and really feel like there is closure with the church and me.
I do not believe that the RCC is the ONE, HOLY, APOSTOLIC church and if we’re to take the sign that God gave me, then neither does He
Really, I do not believe that there is one “right” religion, much less one branch of one religion.
And, it is very obvious that if one is going to purport to being Catholic, one does NOT have to follow all the teachings of the church, since there is much disagreement among branches of the church about what is the correct teaching. The Jesuits are famous grumblers about the dogma, for instance. They’re constantly questioning and challenging things. And the way Catholicism is practiced here (by Bishops no less) may be different than the way it’s practiced a state away. There is a lot of inconsistencies under that umbrella.
I’ve done a lot of theological study, particularly about Catholicism, when I was making my conversion and I just don’t think you can make a blanket statement about how if everyone knew exactly what the Catholic Church stands for and offers, no one would EVER leave, because that’s just not true for everyone.
8. IrishTeresa said:
April 10, 2008 @ 10:40 am | Quote
It really doesn’t matter what local bishops say in regards to Church teaching - if they are not backing up the Pope, they’re wrong. (It matters in how it discourages and misleads the local lay people, of course). But the Catholic church derives its authority from 3 ways:
1) Sacred Tradition - what Jesus said orally (he never wrote a book)to his followers and they in turn passed on to us via the Apostles
2) Sacred Scripture - the Holy Bible
3) The Magesterium of the Church.
If any priest or bishop goes against the Mageterium of the Church, they are wrong, plain and simple. Nobody gets to make up their own rules. Nobody gets to interpret Scripture as they see fit. That’s why we have the Magesterium to do it for us,which relies totally on Divine Inspiration.
But the absolute best thing about the Catholic church is the Real Presence of Christ in the Eucharist. That alone makes all the other parts of being Catholic not only bearable, but in time, enjoyable.
Do I think being Catholic is the only way to get to Heaven? Absolutely not!!! There are many, many fine Christian churches and as long as they advocate the Christ is the only way, they’re good to go. However, they are sorely missing out on the Real Presence in Christ in the Eucharist. That’s what I meant by if people knew what the Church has (and I mean really knew. Really truly believed that the bread & wine becomes the Body and Blood of Christ) they would never leave.
9. Rita. said:
April 10, 2008 @ 11:30 am | Quote
See, I don’t believe that.
First off, I don’t believe that only a Vatican ordained Priest can turn the bread and wine into body and blood. I don’t believe it. I cannot adhere to a set of rules that believes that a man who molests a child can then turn around and consecrate the eucharist. It defies any logic. I do not believe that the church (a human institution with human failings) has the God-given magic to make those decisions. We know that there have been truly evil Popes, so there is no basis for believing that they are anything above human, and they’re the ones that head the church. The idea that the RCC is anything above any other church in any way is just a fairy tale, but it’s worse than that because it propagates fear and lies (hence all of the molesting priests being protected by the church). I think it’s really kind of ill in a lot of ways with the shroud of mystique.
Furthermore I do not believe that Christ is the only way. I do not believe, as I said, in one true religion at all. This is something that I looked into very seriously before even considering conversion, and if you read your catechism, you’ll see that the RCC does not believe that one needs to be Christian in order to be saved, either. There is a lot of non-explicit terminology in there, but the general gist is that yeah, they believe that it’s best to accept Christ as our Savior, but not being exposed to Christ (which is variable–how much exposure counts as “exposure”), then you’re not denied salvation. So, you might want to look into that yourself.
Regardless, I do not believe in a God who would deny people salvation just based upon where they were born. It goes against the all-knowing, all-loving God that we learn about in the Bible.
10. Rita. said:
April 10, 2008 @ 9:44 pm | Quote
I want to add Theresa, that I just really enjoy theological debate and discussion and I hope that you’re not taking any of my remarks about the RCC personally. I’ve really given their positions on things a lot of thought and consideration and just because I disagree with them on items, doesn’t mean I have no respect for people who practice the religion. I know sometimes in my zeal for debate I may come across as harsh or critical, but I don’t mean it that way at all.
11. IrishTeresa said:
April 14, 2008 @ 11:17 am | Quote
Hi Rita, No offense taken. I’m used to negative comments regarding the Church and most of them stem from the Priest/abuse scandal. I think alot of men who had no business, nor any true vocation, being a priest, became one as a cover for their more insidious pasttimes. Unfortunatley, Mother Church took a huge slam for that but as the Jesus said in the Bible, the jaws of hell will not prevail against it.
I know it turns a lot of people off but that is definitely not what the Church is about. Most Priests are dedicated, celibate, loyal servants of Christ. The scandal truly blackened the bunch though, which is a shame.
12. Rita. said:
April 14, 2008 @ 11:44 am | Quote
Oh, I agree with you there. I don’t think that the priesthood “makes” men into pedophiles. I think that pedophiles are attracted to the priesthood because is gives them everything they need–an excuse to not be married, unquestioned power and respect, and direct interaction with children who are supposed to respect them unquestioningly.
What’s hideous is that the church covered it up by relocating those priests so often instead of removing their titles, turing them in for criminal prosecution and getting them help. The church has to accept responsibility for those actions. The fact that it doesn’t, and at the same time continues to declare that a vatican ordained priest has special powers granted to him by God is just hypocritical, don’t you think? To me, it just negates the whole infallible image that the church tries to put on for itself.
But, like I said, I know a lot of Catholics who are able to reconcile that within themselves and I’m not judgmental of them at all, they’ve found some peace and that’s great.