Comments on: How to avoid the inconveniences of pregnancy… http://blog.imperfectparent.com/2007/10/11/how-to-avoid-the-inconveniences-of-pregnancy/ Parenting, Politics and News for the Perfectly Challenged Thu, 04 Dec 2008 04:45:53 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.6 By: Sarah http://blog.imperfectparent.com/2007/10/11/how-to-avoid-the-inconveniences-of-pregnancy/#comment-129471 Sarah Tue, 04 Dec 2007 22:53:51 +0000 http://blog.imperfectparent.com/2007/10/11/how-to-avoid-the-inconveniences-of-pregnancy/#comment-129471 I don't know you but stumbled upon your blog while researching surrogacy + maternity leave. As a woman who was born without a uterus, I will be using a surrogate mother as my only possible way to have a biological child. This woman that you describe probably only took 2 weeks off for "maternity leave," because, as I'm currently finding out, mothers through surrogacy are provided NO maternity leave as they were not pregnant and therefore do not qualify for short-term disability. Nice, huh? Two weeks was probably all she could get. Pretty inconvenient when you consider that almost any reputable daycare center will not take a child under 6 weeks. Just my 2 cents. I don’t know you but stumbled upon your blog while researching surrogacy + maternity leave. As a woman who was born without a uterus, I will be using a surrogate mother as my only possible way to have a biological child.

This woman that you describe probably only took 2 weeks off for “maternity leave,” because, as I’m currently finding out, mothers through surrogacy are provided NO maternity leave as they were not pregnant and therefore do not qualify for short-term disability.

Nice, huh?

Two weeks was probably all she could get. Pretty inconvenient when you consider that almost any reputable daycare center will not take a child under 6 weeks.

Just my 2 cents.

]]> By: Dana http://blog.imperfectparent.com/2007/10/11/how-to-avoid-the-inconveniences-of-pregnancy/#comment-117533 Dana Mon, 29 Oct 2007 17:33:46 +0000 http://blog.imperfectparent.com/2007/10/11/how-to-avoid-the-inconveniences-of-pregnancy/#comment-117533 Holy cats. This woman is a little nuts. I started to laugh when you told us she thought she had PPD. Not that I thought it was funny, I thought it was a cry out for attention or something. Holy cats. This woman is a little nuts. I started to laugh when you told us she thought she had PPD. Not that I thought it was funny, I thought it was a cry out for attention or something.

]]> By: Kelly Reising http://blog.imperfectparent.com/2007/10/11/how-to-avoid-the-inconveniences-of-pregnancy/#comment-114546 Kelly Reising Tue, 16 Oct 2007 11:03:22 +0000 http://blog.imperfectparent.com/2007/10/11/how-to-avoid-the-inconveniences-of-pregnancy/#comment-114546 Don't judge until you have "walked a mile in her shoes." I can quote J LO becaue I'm young! Ha- K Don’t judge until you have “walked a mile in her shoes.”

I can quote J LO becaue I’m young!

Ha-
K

]]> By: Jessica http://blog.imperfectparent.com/2007/10/11/how-to-avoid-the-inconveniences-of-pregnancy/#comment-114505 Jessica Mon, 15 Oct 2007 20:34:03 +0000 http://blog.imperfectparent.com/2007/10/11/how-to-avoid-the-inconveniences-of-pregnancy/#comment-114505 [quote comment="114501"] She sounds like too much of a baby herself to hack real life as a working mama.[/quote] LOL! That is so wrong and funny at the same time! I love it!! [quote comment="114501"]
She sounds like too much of a baby herself to hack real life as a working mama.[/quote]

LOL! That is so wrong and funny at the same time!

I love it!!

]]> By: redsy http://blog.imperfectparent.com/2007/10/11/how-to-avoid-the-inconveniences-of-pregnancy/#comment-114501 redsy Mon, 15 Oct 2007 18:46:01 +0000 http://blog.imperfectparent.com/2007/10/11/how-to-avoid-the-inconveniences-of-pregnancy/#comment-114501 Well color me bitchy but the woman in this story sounds like a total wimp. And for her to describe her sadness as post-partum depression is insulting to the women who actually have it. I get that having a new baby and going back to work (after buying your kid for a grillion dollars) is stressful... but I think she made the right choice. She sounds like too much of a baby herself to hack real life as a working mama. Well color me bitchy but the woman in this story sounds like a total wimp. And for her to describe her sadness as post-partum depression is insulting to the women who actually have it.

I get that having a new baby and going back to work (after buying your kid for a grillion dollars) is stressful… but I think she made the right choice.

She sounds like too much of a baby herself to hack real life as a working mama.

]]> By: Kelly Reising http://blog.imperfectparent.com/2007/10/11/how-to-avoid-the-inconveniences-of-pregnancy/#comment-114215 Kelly Reising Sat, 13 Oct 2007 12:54:50 +0000 http://blog.imperfectparent.com/2007/10/11/how-to-avoid-the-inconveniences-of-pregnancy/#comment-114215 Hey Jessica, I usually don't get involved in these kind of discussions after what happened when I wrote about "detached parenting." But that said, I just had to say something. That woman did have a valid reason not to carry a child herself. I was lucky to have two very easy pregnancies, but as you know not everyone does. It's more risk for some people to be pregnant than to allow yourself to pay someone to do it for you. It sounds kind of horrible in a way to pay for someone's womb, but if you have the money than why not? Many people have had children under worse circumstances. I could never be a surragate. I'm too selfish. All the stretch marks and minimal pain I went through to get my two girls were definitely worth it. But I couldn't do that for somneone else. Maybe if I had a sister I could. Who knows. As far as her financial situation goes. Nannies are expensive and worth it. But it sounds like this poor woman just wants to be home with her child more than anything. With all the money they spent to get the baby it sucks that it's caused her family financial stress. Because that is real stress too, on top of having a new baby. Best, Kelly Reising Mother Magnetism Hey Jessica,
I usually don’t get involved in these kind of discussions after what happened when I wrote about “detached parenting.” But that said, I just had to say something. That woman did have a valid reason not to carry a child herself. I was lucky to have two very easy pregnancies, but as you know not everyone does. It’s more risk for some people to be pregnant than to allow yourself to pay someone to do it for you.
It sounds kind of horrible in a way to pay for someone’s womb, but if you have the money than why not? Many people have had children under worse circumstances.
I could never be a surragate. I’m too selfish. All the stretch marks and minimal pain I went through to get my two girls were definitely worth it. But I couldn’t do that for somneone else. Maybe if I had a sister I could. Who knows.
As far as her financial situation goes. Nannies are expensive and worth it. But it sounds like this poor woman just wants to be home with her child more than anything. With all the money they spent to get the baby it sucks that it’s caused her family financial stress. Because that is real stress too, on top of having a new baby.

Best,
Kelly Reising
Mother Magnetism

]]> By: Cara http://blog.imperfectparent.com/2007/10/11/how-to-avoid-the-inconveniences-of-pregnancy/#comment-114088 Cara Sat, 13 Oct 2007 04:27:35 +0000 http://blog.imperfectparent.com/2007/10/11/how-to-avoid-the-inconveniences-of-pregnancy/#comment-114088 She doesn't have biological ppd, but I can certainly see how someone who has just had to start taking care of a newborn could exhibit signs of ppd due to lack of sleep and just general worry about such a tiny baby. She didn't have the luxury (ha!) of having practice not getting any sleep due to third trimester discomforts. It does make you wonder why she even started working there in the first place though. She clearly knew that they would be having a baby soon. Maybe she just wanted to earn some extra cash but didn't want to admit to prospective employers that she only needed something temporary. She doesn’t have biological ppd, but I can certainly see how someone who has just had to start taking care of a newborn could exhibit signs of ppd due to lack of sleep and just general worry about such a tiny baby. She didn’t have the luxury (ha!) of having practice not getting any sleep due to third trimester discomforts.

It does make you wonder why she even started working there in the first place though. She clearly knew that they would be having a baby soon. Maybe she just wanted to earn some extra cash but didn’t want to admit to prospective employers that she only needed something temporary.

]]> By: Christine http://blog.imperfectparent.com/2007/10/11/how-to-avoid-the-inconveniences-of-pregnancy/#comment-113869 Christine Fri, 12 Oct 2007 04:54:39 +0000 http://blog.imperfectparent.com/2007/10/11/how-to-avoid-the-inconveniences-of-pregnancy/#comment-113869 I feel very sad for the newest addition to their family. There's definitely some instability there. I feel very sad for the newest addition to their family. There’s definitely some instability there.

]]> By: Rita http://blog.imperfectparent.com/2007/10/11/how-to-avoid-the-inconveniences-of-pregnancy/#comment-113802 Rita Thu, 11 Oct 2007 21:03:37 +0000 http://blog.imperfectparent.com/2007/10/11/how-to-avoid-the-inconveniences-of-pregnancy/#comment-113802 I have actually heard of PPD hitting mothers of adopted babies. It isn't the same as biological PPD, but it is a depressive mode due to sudden lack of sleep and adjustment to the baby and everything. So, that isn't entirely made up. I have actually heard of PPD hitting mothers of adopted babies. It isn’t the same as biological PPD, but it is a depressive mode due to sudden lack of sleep and adjustment to the baby and everything. So, that isn’t entirely made up.

]]> By: Allison http://blog.imperfectparent.com/2007/10/11/how-to-avoid-the-inconveniences-of-pregnancy/#comment-113798 Allison Thu, 11 Oct 2007 19:50:20 +0000 http://blog.imperfectparent.com/2007/10/11/how-to-avoid-the-inconveniences-of-pregnancy/#comment-113798 Wow. I'm sorry, but I really have a problem feeling sad for people who are in the situations they are due to the CHOICES they make. She says she has "postpartum depression". That one made me laugh out loud!!!!! Wow. I’m sorry, but I really have a problem feeling sad for people who are in the situations they are due to the CHOICES they make.

She says she has “postpartum depression”. That one made me laugh out loud!!!!!

]]> By: Rita http://blog.imperfectparent.com/2007/10/11/how-to-avoid-the-inconveniences-of-pregnancy/#comment-113795 Rita Thu, 11 Oct 2007 19:25:23 +0000 http://blog.imperfectparent.com/2007/10/11/how-to-avoid-the-inconveniences-of-pregnancy/#comment-113795 Frightening glimpse into a frightening situation that you couldn't even make up. I swear, if that was in a book, people wouldn't believe it, they'd think it's too contrived. How absoultely screwy. Makes you feel better about yourself, though, doesn't it? Doesn't it? Frightening glimpse into a frightening situation that you couldn’t even make up. I swear, if that was in a book, people wouldn’t believe it, they’d think it’s too contrived. How absoultely screwy.

Makes you feel better about yourself, though, doesn’t it? Doesn’t it?

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