Would you breastfeed a 5 year old?
Posted
July 29, 2007 at
1:35 pm by
Jessica
The World Health Organization recommends you nurse a toddler until 2 years old, basing that off of available resources of third world countries. In countries where adequate nutrition is accessible, is this necessary or could it even be harmful if based strictly on societal taboos? Should our society be more open to the potential nurturing advantages of extending breastfeeding?
Food for thought…
If a child in a third world country remembers drinking milk from his/her mother’s breast, surely that memory would be one of thankfulness for the meeting of needs such as nourishment and possible survival. If a child from a developed country remembers drinking from a mother’s breast, can or will he/she feel the same way?
In some cases, there are mothers who continue to nurse children who have turned 4 or even 5 years old, which is old enough to enter kindergarten, believing their children will reap nutritional benefits.
“The idea of breast-feeding a child until they’re a preschooler is still fairly restricted to a small group of women, or at least, it’s kept in the closet,” said ABC News parenting contributor Ann Pleshette Murphy.
The practice of extended nursing has sparked heated controversy because some disagree about when it is no longer appropriate to breast-feed children.
Some critics say breast-feeding too long could potentially stunt child development. Read the rest…
Tags: breastfeeding, extended-breastfeeding, formula-feeding, nursing, Social Issues |
37 Responses to “Would you breastfeed a 5 year old?”
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1. tina said:
August 18, 2007 @ 9:21 am
i still breastfeed my 5 year old…mainly at night to get her to sleep we read as well. i dont thinkits harming anyone..all her needs are being met
2. Amanda said:
June 4, 2008 @ 8:13 pm
Are you joking me? You completely switched around the World Health Organizations words! They say to breastfeed for AT LEAST TWO years. Not up to. Get your facts straight and stop spreading misinformation. In fact no major health organization out there, weather it be WHO, AAP, UNICEF or anyone else, puts out any set weaning age.
AAP says to exclusively breastfeed for 6 months and to continue breastfeeding for at least one year. After that year, if both mother and child are still comfortable, they recommend you continue breastfeeding. Both WHO and UNICEF reccomed at least two years. If you find anything different from either sites please do cite your source.
Why do you even care how long someone breastfeeds their child? Its not hurting you, and it isn’t hurting the child. I know many people who were breastfed for well over 2 years old and a lot of them remember it. I even know 2 males who were breastfed for 4 and 5 years and they are both great guys with high respect for women. None of these people are ashamed they were breastfed for so long and all of them have fond memories.
Maybe you should mind your own business.
3. Grandma frm Ks. said:
June 4, 2008 @ 9:08 pm
Oh my lord Jessica, I really see why you are a great writer, b/c if some one told me to mind my own business I’d probably be all over them like snot on a nose, I don’t know about breast feeding could potentially stunt child development, but I’d never have a 3, 4, or 5 yr old tugging away on my breast, to me that is absurd, OMG they have a full set of teeth, anyway enough to get all the nutrition they need from chewing food for them selves, but to each her own, I just hope I never have to see some woman holding a kid with his/ or her legs almost touching the dang floor sucking away on mommas breast, I don’t know if I’d laugh or just throw up, I mean really this would be done behind closed doors right?
4. ninja weiner nah nah said:
June 4, 2008 @ 9:32 pm
If they are old enough to chew, get off the boob!
5. Stacey S said:
June 4, 2008 @ 10:46 pm
If it works for you, that’s great…personally, anything older than one or two would be out of my comfort zone. I stopped at 4 months (my initial goal was to nurse for 6 months) as soon as my son cut his bottom teeth & started using my nipples as a teething ring!
Hey Jessica….you get this much of a response on breastfeeding….what would happen if you wrote an article about sharing a “family bed?” LOL
6. Grandma frm Ks. said:
June 5, 2008 @ 12:32 am
StaceyS, a what bed? you mean every body in one bed,? Now that would get a responce don’t ya think? and Jessica could pull it off too. StaceyS, you and JamieS on the same page or what? LOL
7. Amanda said:
June 5, 2008 @ 7:57 am
Oh yeah, you’re all right. As soon as my daughter can reach the fridge and open it herself then I’m going to stop feeding her food altogether. Right? I mean thats a great excuse to stop breastfeeding, because they have teeth, or they can ask for it, or they can get it for themselves. That makes complete sense.
Grandma frm KS., I’m going to go out on a limb here and guess you’re a grandma. Anyway, judging from both my grandma’s, and from even my mom’s generation who some are now grandma’s, you probably never even breastfed. In fact, you probably deemed it “white trash” or “below you”. So, if you haven’t breastfed, then you can’t tell anyone what to do regarding it. I don’t see why mothers who never breastfed or who have breastfed for a few months think they are the be all end all on breastfeeding.
Breastfeeding a toddler or a young child is none of anyone elses business. If you don’t want to see it, look away. If anything, not breastfeeding a child can stunt their growth. Most recently I heard of disgusting people who have a “lactation fetish”. Yes, there really are freaks out there like that. So I do my research on it, like any concerned breastfeeding parent. None of these guys were breastfed as babies. Some say that they may have been breastfed for a month or so, but none of the others that I’ve seen soo far have been breastfed. And I’m sure the rest were touched as children too.
I’m not saying that every non-breastfed kid will end up with a lactation fetish, but I do not know any kid full-term breastfed child who harbors ill will toward their mother for giving them the nutrients they need.
Sorry to disappoint you, but breasts are not a pleasure center. More than 80% (and I’ve even found 90% and 99%) of woman do not get sexually aroused with nipple or breast stimulation. Yes men are attracted to them, what part of the body aren’t they attracted to? But that doesn’t mean that they’re sexual. Some could even say that men are attracted to breasts for reproduction reasons, which again leads to breastfeeding.
So, once again, mind your own business. No one is coming to your house and telling you how to raise your children/grand children. Why don’t you stop telling others what you deem is right or wrong? Why not focus on something more serious like child abuse?
8. Jennifer said:
June 5, 2008 @ 8:23 am
Wow, I dont think I’ve ever seen the line “mind your own business” so many times before in my life! But Grandma, you’re response was too funny. IMO, I couldn’t breast feed a child over the age of 2, maybe not even that long! lol Their too big to even hold at that point! I do know that I dont want to see what boobs look like after breastfeeding a kid straight for five years, especially a grown child with a mouth full of teeth.. ouch! But couldn’t breast feeding your child till the age of 5 somehow problem the child with seperation issues or other issues since 5 is pretty much the intro to the age of reason.
9. Rita said:
June 5, 2008 @ 8:57 am
[quote comment="168277"]
So, once again, mind your own business. No one is coming to your house and telling you how to raise your children/grand children. Why don’t you stop telling others what you deem is right or wrong? Why not focus on something more serious like child abuse?[/quote]
I have to agree with this. This is just the flip-side of the thing I wrote about JLo NOT choosing NOT to breastfeed (http://blog.imperfectparent.com/2008/04/14/jenny-from-the-blog/). If it’s not actual abuse, then who cares? Would *I* breastfeed a 5 year-old? No, but I can’t seem to manage to breastfeed a 15-minute-old. Eh, live and let live.
10. Rita said:
June 5, 2008 @ 9:07 am
[quote comment="168282"]But couldn’t breast feeding your child till the age of 5 somehow problem the child with seperation issues or other issues since 5 is pretty much the intro to the age of reason.[/quote]
Actually, if you lump it into Attachment Parenting practices, then no. AP practices (when used with common sense disciplinary techniques and not just as a cover to let your kids run all over you) do not cause a higher level of dependency on the parents at all. It’s a method of meeting the needs of your child as your child grows and matures, so that the child initiates the separation. It’s been shown that parents who provide that unconditional acceptance and nurturing actually have children who are more comfortable introducing small periods of separation than those who push their kids into independence according to some outside timeline. There is a strong behaviorist explanation to this, but I get the feeling that going into it would be a big waste of my time and energy, since I just am not sure that it would sink in here…
Anyway, bottom line is no, there isn’t anything to suggest that extended nursing would cause an increase in issues with separation in a child. But, remember, these things are looking at LONG TERM psychological health, too. So, if you’re judging a two year old, and one child that age has adapted to getting needs met from sources other than their parents and one child who is accustomed to getting needs met by their parents, then they may exhibit different reactions to being separated. Two is the height of separation anxiety for toddlers, which is why I’m using that age. But, then fast-forward to the teen years and child 1 who was taught to self-cope as a toddler might have some dysfunctional ways of dealing with stress and anxiety, whereas child 2 was given more time and space to grow into independence and therefore deals with things in a healthy way as a teen.
There’s a LOT in this.
11. Jennifer said:
June 5, 2008 @ 9:18 am
[quote comment="168289"][quote comment="168282"]But couldn’t breast feeding your child till the age of 5 somehow problem the child with seperation issues or other issues since 5 is pretty much the intro to the age of reason.[/quote]
Actually, if you lump it into Attachment Parenting practices, then no. AP practices (when used with common sense disciplinary techniques and not just as a cover to let your kids run all over you) do not cause a higher level of dependency on the parents at all. It’s a method of meeting the needs of your child as your child grows and matures, so that the child initiates the separation. It’s been shown that parents who provide that unconditional acceptance and nurturing actually have children who are more comfortable introducing small periods of separation than those who push their kids into independence according to some outside timeline. There is a strong behaviorist explanation to this, but I get the feeling that going into it would be a big waste of my time and energy, since I just am not sure that it would sink in here…
Anyway, bottom line is no, there isn’t anything to suggest that extended nursing would cause an increase in issues with separation in a child. But, remember, these things are looking at LONG TERM psychological health, too. So, if you’re judging a two year old, and one child that age has adapted to getting needs met from sources other than their parents and one child who is accustomed to getting needs met by their parents, then they may exhibit different reactions to being separated. Two is the height of separation anxiety for toddlers, which is why I’m using that age. But, then fast-forward to the teen years and child 1 who was taught to self-cope as a toddler might have some dysfunctional ways of dealing with stress and anxiety, whereas child 2 was given more time and space to grow into independence and therefore deals with things in a healthy way as a teen.
There’s a LOT in this.[/quote]
Thanks for the explanation Rita!!!
12. Stacey S said:
June 5, 2008 @ 10:02 am
WOW….strong opinions here! I re-read all the posts and I really didn’t see anyone come out and say it’s “wrong” to breastfeed after a certain age….there was a question thrown out about what do you THINK….so posters expressed THEIR opinions about the topic….you want to breastfeed your 10 year old….knock your socks off! The posters who said they weren’t comfortable with nursing older children never told the ones that were they were wrong or that it was inappropriate, they just pretty much said it’s not for them. I didn’t get the feeling there was anybody judging others who are comfortable with nursing for longer periods of time. However I did detect a bit of anger & hostility from the moms who are comfortable nursing for longer periods of time towards the ones that are not.
I personally think(that means my opinion…not what I think is best or right for anyone else other then me) its super dooper important to breastfeed….even if it’s just for a few days so your baby can have at the very least the colostrum. I DO believe it makes healthier children. As I posted earlier I only nursed for 4 months, but just for the record….my son has VERY seldom been sick and at 16 (in 2 weeks) he is 6′4” and weights approx. 220 LBS with a size 14 shoe. Not what I would describe as stunted.
This topic is a personal choice for each and every individual and NOBODY should be JUDGED on their decision to breastfeed or not to breastfeed…..the topic I believe was would YOU breastfeed your 5 year old.
13. Jennifer said:
June 5, 2008 @ 10:15 am
Hopefully this clears all the hostility lol
Thanks Stacey!!
14. Jessica. said:
June 5, 2008 @ 10:49 am
[quote comment="168277"]Oh yeah, you’re all right. As soon as my daughter can reach the fridge and open it herself then I’m going to stop feeding her food altogether. Right? I mean thats a great excuse to stop breastfeeding, because they have teeth, or they can ask for it, or they can get it for themselves. That makes complete sense.[/quote]
It may make perfect sense for one mother and not another. To take your “mind your business” one step further, if a mother decides that nursing a child who can get themselves food on their own is uncomfortable for them, then shouldn’t those that disagree that in turn, mind their own business as well?
I agree with the live and let live attitude, but mothers have a *right* to deem what is appropriate for them and their families and what is not.
I don’t think the analogy of refusing food to a child that can reach the fridge works though, because that really would be neglectful and abusive whereas simply not breastfeeding at that age is not neglectful or abusive, nor is extending breastfeeding for that matter. Either choice is completely valid, although bfing a 5 year old is probably more culturally unacceptable in the U.S.
I certainly wouldn’t be comfortable bfing a child past infancy, but that is simply part of who I am. My body, my choices - your body, your choices.
15. Grandma frm Ks. said:
June 5, 2008 @ 1:19 pm
Gosh, I really did not mean to upset Amanda that bad, I was just shocked by some things I’ve heard lately either said to her or about her,(Jessica) And yes I am a grand ma and would never tell a writer of a blog that I am welcomed to use, to mind their own business, JMO, Also Amanda , don’t know you, your mom, or grandma, but there was probably more breast feeding going on back in their day than today, I was raised to believe that was the best way to feed, I also remember riding a city bus while in high school and seeing women pull out this big ole honker size boop and stick it in some 3-4 yr olds mouth, Hey I don’t care, my daughters breast fed their babies, but no one in public ever saw it, Thank you StaceyS, for re-reading, b/c I would never tell any one what they are comfortable with not to do. And Rita that was some good info,Explained a lot, but as StaceyS said to each her own, how was that? knock your socks off LOL
16. Rita said:
June 5, 2008 @ 2:22 pm
Well, being NOT Amanda, I can only speculate, but it seems some of her “hostility” was just a reaction to being told that something she does or believes in is harmful to her child.
Just like when people lash out in anger when they’re told they’re feeding their babies poison when they formula feed, or that they’re lazy and selfish.
So, it seems she just really zeroed in on the “could this be harmful?” parts of the entry and reacted. I know I’ve done that before, but on the opposite side of the feeding debate.
Being a mom is hard.
17. Stacey S said:
June 5, 2008 @ 3:49 pm
I suppose that could be a reason for the reaction….however Amanda’s post was #2….a bit before anyone may have suggested or asked if it could potentially be harmful to nurse a child beyond a certain age. I believe the intent of the Author was to strike up a conversation based on an article that she read….not wrote….simply read and thought it would be an interesting topic on the IMPERFECT parenting blog IMO. Which is why the link to the actual article was provided.
“WOULD YOU BREASTFEED A 5 YEAL OLD”? was the question posed by the author based on that article It’s just a question thrown out in the world to strike up a conversation…not a debate. IMO.
My answer was no…Clearly other people said yes. Whatever….
18. Grandma frm Ks. said:
June 5, 2008 @ 4:15 pm
StaceyS you got a way with getting the bird back in his cage, calmly and quickly, That is good.
19. Stacey S said:
June 5, 2008 @ 4:30 pm
Grandma,
Although I appreciate the cheering section (I know you mean well) I am not attacking anyone….just putting my thoughts out there & when you “back up” my statements or others….I think that’s what comes off as “gang mentality”. Like I said…I know you mean well, & I do appreciate it…but it isn’t necessary. This was meant with no disrespect.
20. Allison J said:
June 5, 2008 @ 9:27 pm
I’m only asking out of curiosity…
Did those of you who breastfed, or are breastfeeding, children past infancy pump and feed, or are the children on the breast?
21. Jessica. said:
June 5, 2008 @ 9:32 pm
[quote comment="168487"]I’m only asking out of curiosity…
Did those of you who breastfed, or are breastfeeding, children past infancy pump and feed, or are the children on the breast?[/quote]
I didn’t bf past a few months, but I know from extended bf’drs, that they would actually nurse from the breast at any age, toddler on. The bottle would be seen by most who would bf that long as a detachment tool. Nursing until that age is more about comfort, or so they I have been told, so it’s not actually about the milk itself but suckling at the breast.
22. Allison J said:
June 5, 2008 @ 9:36 pm
[quote comment="168488"][quote comment="168487"]I’m only asking out of curiosity…
Did those of you who breastfed, or are breastfeeding, children past infancy pump and feed, or are the children on the breast?[/quote]
I didn’t bf past a few months, but I know from extended bf’drs, that they would actually nurse from the breast at any age, toddler on. The bottle would be seen by most who would bf that long as a detachment tool. Nursing until that age is more about comfort, or so they I have been told, so it’s not actually about the milk itself but suckling at the breast.[/quote]
Thanks!
23. Amanda said:
June 5, 2008 @ 9:48 pm
[quote comment="168408"]Well, being NOT Amanda, I can only speculate, but it seems some of her “hostility” was just a reaction to being told that something she does or believes in is harmful to her child.
Just like when people lash out in anger when they’re told they’re feeding their babies poison when they formula feed, or that they’re lazy and selfish.
So, it seems she just really zeroed in on the “could this be harmful?” parts of the entry and reacted. I know I’ve done that before, but on the opposite side of the feeding debate.
Being a mom is hard.[/quote]
Actually my first comment was that the author of the post misquoted and completely switched around the words of WHO, and then I went on to state what WHO, AAP, and UNICEF actually say. The second response was to your ignorant comments and Grandma. Saying that it’s absurd and that they have a full set of teeth, so of course they shouldn’t breastfeed. Oh, but I guess you put that it’s your opinion in it so that makes it all better.
24. Stacey S said:
June 5, 2008 @ 10:00 pm
um pretty much!
25. Jessica said:
June 5, 2008 @ 10:01 pm
Actually my first comment was that the author of the post misquoted and completely switched around the words of WHO, and then I went on to state what WHO, AAP, and UNICEF actually say.[/quote]
Well, why don’t you post the WHO’s recommendation so it will be forever accurate and correct. You can cut and paste it from their site. I would be interested in that.
26. Grandma frm Ks. said:
June 5, 2008 @ 10:10 pm
Oh my Lord I am so sorry I even got in n this debate or what ever, Really did not mean to offend any one, I’m not wanting to oh hell never mind.
27. momof3 said:
June 5, 2008 @ 10:17 pm
I have to say that I bfed all three of my kids! My first one I bfed for 6mo (she weaned herself when we went on vacation b/c she wouldnt nurse in the car) and my son I nursed for about a month before we found out that he was born with Galactosemia and couldnt have milk. My third I bfed for 11 mo and I enjoyed every second of it after I got over mastitus for the fifth time!!! It was such a wonderful bonding experience and it made me feel closer to her especially since I had two other kids running around; it was quiet time for her and I together! I had mastitus about 3-5 times with each child!!! It is extremely painful and I almost quit each time but I really wanted to nurse for as long as I could (but not until my child was 5, thats just not for me!) I dont think anyone is bad for wanting to do what THEY think is right for THEM but I would like to see the same respect towards me and others. JMO of course!
28. Rita said:
June 6, 2008 @ 9:39 am
[quote comment="168496"][quote comment="168408"]Well, being NOT Amanda, I can only speculate, but it seems some of her “hostility” was just a reaction to being told that something she does or believes in is harmful to her child.
Just like when people lash out in anger when they’re told they’re feeding their babies poison when they formula feed, or that they’re lazy and selfish.
So, it seems she just really zeroed in on the “could this be harmful?” parts of the entry and reacted. I know I’ve done that before, but on the opposite side of the feeding debate.
Being a mom is hard.[/quote]
Actually my first comment was that the author of the post misquoted and completely switched around the words of WHO, and then I went on to state what WHO, AAP, and UNICEF actually say. The second response was to your ignorant comments and Grandma. Saying that it’s absurd and that they have a full set of teeth, so of course they shouldn’t breastfeed. Oh, but I guess you put that it’s your opinion in it so that makes it all better.[/quote]
Huh? I was defending you, you know? If this was a mistake, using my quote and then saying that you were responding to my ignorant comments, and so forth, I think you should clarify and correct. Because, if you look around, I’m like the only one here who’s sticking up for you at all.
29. Jamie said:
June 6, 2008 @ 11:05 am
mmmm milk
30. Stacey S said:
June 6, 2008 @ 11:30 am
See Rita…that’s the thing I find odd. Nobody was attacking Amanda for her choice (or not) to nurse her child or children at ANY age…the other posters here just found it out of they’re comfort level & it just wasn’t for them. Amanda was the one who came off as being irate because we may not share the same opinion as her or that the author “misquoted” something. Her very first post came off as a bit bitter. So I’m not altogether sure why there was a need to defend her.
There is a way to DISCUSS opposing opinions without resorting to name calling. Actually if you post in a way that comes off as more intelligent and articulate you may even be able to teach somebody something and give people something to think about. If you come off as angry & bitter it just causes people to become defensive and shut down. Then nothing is learned from either side. Not very productive IMO (”making it better”)