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Filed under: News & Politics

Should breastfeeding moms automatically be awarded custody?

Posted February 10, 2007 at 7:27 pm by Jessica

I can’t wait until men start crying “reverse discrimination” based on South Carolina’s Breastfeeding Action Committee’s interference support on the behalf of a mother who is fighting for sole custody of her 8 1/2 month old baby, on grounds that she’s breastfeeding.

As unpopular as my opinion’s going to be, that has never stopped me from voicing it, so here it goes:

1) having kids is unpredictable and usually involves an equal partner, whom you make a commitment with and who is half of the makeup of your childs DNA (usually)

2) breastfeeding moms are no guarantee of superior parenting skills, it wouldn’t surprise me if Andrea Yates breastfed her children

3) The “Breastfeeding Action Committee” bases what’s best for babies based solely on breastfeeding, a overly-simplistic assumption based on little information

4) There are safe alternatives to breastfeeding in South Carolina, including expressed breast milk

5) A father has rights too. If you don’t want a man in the picture, have some sperm donated.

6) Pump for a few days or a week, it won’t kill you or your baby

7) Work out a compromise, you go to the baby a few times a day and nurse, and have Dad bring the baby to you a few times a day to nurse

8) This claim can only take you so far and last for so long. The baby in question is now 8 months old. A few days off from a moms breast is not going to kill him.

9) This sounds like an excuse

10) This quote from the mom, “That’s what women were made for.  They’re made to nurture babies.  That’s why women have breasts,” Garris told News 2’s Jenny Fisher,” makes me want to point out that she should speak for herself. I don’t believe that is what women are for. I think I’m much more than a milk provider, and in my case, it wasn’t breastfeeding that defined my reason for existence, since I didn’t do it for very long anyway. I’d rather not be a woman if my only reason for being “made” was to milk a baby.

From WCBD-TV/DT NBC - Charleston, NC:

The South Carolina Breastfeeding Action Committee is stepping in to monitor this custody case…and another one.  They say babies need breast milk.  Allison Lanford Smith, a SCBAC representative says, “The long-term health benefits of breastfeeding decrease obesity, diabetes and asthma.”

SCBAC wants legislation passed, allowing breast feeding moms custody of their children, unless the child is in danger.  Currently, three states focus on breastfeeding when judges rule on custody disputes.  They are: Maine, Michigan and Utah.

The committee says the effort does not limit the father’s role in his child’s life.  Jenny asked Landford Smith, “Why couldn’t the baby’s father say, ‘Why don’t you pump your breast milk and I’ll give the baby that?’  He could easily argue that she does not need custody to breastfeed the baby.”  Landford Smith said, “Right.  I understand that.  It’s easy for mom’s to breastfeed at work, because it’s just several hours in a day, but when it’s at night, for several days at a time, with another parent, it’s very difficult for a mom, with a breast pump, to keep up her milk supply.”

Carl Garris declined to talk with us, but Melissa Garris says she wants legislation to make sure other nursing moms don’t go through an emotional and costly battle for their babies.

 

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31 Responses to “Should breastfeeding moms automatically be awarded custody?”

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31. Jennifer

July 14, 2008 @ 11:24 pm

If there is a custody issue in the first place, I think that’s the bigger problem, not whether a baby goes a few days on a bottle or not.

I agree with a previous poster…this is ridiculous. Are we to believe that all “good” breastfeeding mothers have experienced a 100% attendance rate (no overnight trips, no stays at Grandma’s for baby, no daycare at all) and that trumps the rights of a father? So if someone can claim they have never been away from their child that they are automatically the better parent?

Lesson to new moms: Be flexible with your feeding! BF, formula, hybrid of the two, breast, bottle…get your child used to them all. You won’t regret the freedom you get from doing so!

The idea that somehow breastfeeding (which I agree is good and I managed to do for 5 weeks before my son rejected it entirely) is so heads and shoulders above the act of parenting by two caring parents is silly. My son is happily formula fed, and is big happy and healthy. The doctor has repeatedly said, “whatever you are doing, keep doing it because he’s fantastic” so instead of using breastfeeding as an excuse (which cheapens its value in my opinion) find alternative ways to meet baby’s nutritional needs so his or her spiritual and familial needs can be met which are more important anyway! Sheesh! Let’s get some perspective!

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