Winter, Chicago style
Posted
December 1, 2006 at
7:23 pm by
Prescott
A few days ago, Jay Allen documented the crushing 1/32″ of ice that brought Seattle to its knees. In contrast, I bring you the view of my own backyard earlier today. Here you go, you latte-drinking dirty hippies, this is what winter really looks like:
That’s right, motherfuckers, that’s no wimpy “crust”, you’re looking at over 12 inches of snow in less than six hours. For a little visual perspective, here’s my car:
We also make sure there’s plenty of black ice under all that snow because that is how we roll (or slide, as the case may be).
And when weather like this happens, do we go crying to our mommies and shut down the whole city? No way. We dig ourselves out of our parking space, throw our shit in the street, and get our asses to work. My wife called to see if her office was open today, and human resources said, “You can feel free to take the day off, you big baby — an UNPAID day off.
So remember that next time you coasters want to make fun of the rubes in fly-over country, because we’ll beat you with our snow shovels — while not wearing a coat, coats are for the weak — and leave you to die in a snow drift.
Tags: chicago, snow, winter
 |
8 Responses to “Winter, Chicago style”
RSS feed for comments on this post.
Leave a comment
Comments are moderated and may not appear immediately in an effort to remove commercial messages, irrelevancies, excessive foul language, racist/sexist/hateful comments, spoofed/cloaked IPs and/or personal attacks and will be edited/deleted at our discretion. Thank you for your patience.
Entire Blog
1. Herb Urban said:
December 1, 2006 @ 11:23 pm | Quote
Mock us if you will, but my double tall decaf 2% pumpkin spice venti latte from 4buck$ was a tepid luke warm brew by the time I pulled out of the drive- thru, the next day when we returned to work.
I’ll accept an apologize in the form of a $5 gift card, which I’ll use towards a Norah Jones cd.
2. mamazilla said:
December 2, 2006 @ 12:05 am | Quote
i just wanted to let you know that i want to be you when i grow up.
3. Rachael said:
December 2, 2006 @ 12:32 pm | Quote
You certainly have us whimpy Washingtonians beat, Prescott… 5 inches of snow up here in Bellingham has shut the city down for a week. My husband’s comment “get out a motherfucking snow shovel, people” is his inner Denver snow boy talkin’.
4. Amy said:
December 2, 2006 @ 11:07 pm | Quote
And then here I am, just South of I-80, also in the Chicago ‘burbs, and we got nuttin’. Just a sloppy 2″ mess.
I’d prefer the bright white and snow day. At least once anyway.
And so would the dude who plows my driveway.
5. Prescott said:
December 2, 2006 @ 11:16 pm | Quote
And to think, just west of you on I-80 people were stuck in their cars for hours and hours. You missed out.
Rachael, I bow to your husband, Denver definitely has even us beat on the snow front. Listen to his teachings, grasshopper.
I’m glad you Washingtonians have a sense of humor, I made a playful jab at L.A. a few months ago and the response was not as pleasant….
6. tori said:
December 4, 2006 @ 4:09 pm | Quote
I shoveled the entire driveway by hand since we don’t have a snowblower. We have the longest driveway on earth (not really, but it sure felt like it!) I just posted pictures on my blog today because I was finally able to feel my arms again!
7. Jessica said:
December 4, 2006 @ 5:52 pm | Quote
Tori, you know why you did it by hand? You’re in Illinois and you’re a bad mutha! Cheers to you!! Great pics BTW, and you do have a long driveway, but ours is longer.
8. chris-------say said:
December 4, 2006 @ 11:08 pm | Quote
Hey Prescott. We were at DisneyWorld at the time and we were hearing these horrible reports about all the snow and it was so terrible and “what are we going to do?”
I live on the southside and when we flew into Midway we only had maybe 4-5 inches. Oh, please.
You Northsiders got socked!
ps You have lovely backyard!