The last thing you want to hear from an old friend when you’ve run into them on the streets is, “Uh, wow, you look so different, you look (and with all the fake sincerity one can muster) good.” In case you’re of the naive variety, that’s code for “Wow, you’re so fat and old looking now.” With any luck, your “friend” will also be fat and old looking and you can say with real sincerity, “Same to you.”

Sure, there are those moms that can squeeze out four tyrants and volunteer for every school committee known to man, yet still look as though they should be carded while buying wine and still be able fit into their high school jeans (which might even be back in style!), but then there are those who try as they might (like me) always seem to feel they need to lose a little and sigh with each new wrinkle. 

You know whenever I hear a celebrity talk about how much they love turning 40 or 50 and how wise they’ve become and how proud they are of their wrinkles, I shout out loud, “Liar. LIAR!!” They’re liars. Full of dog squeeze.

So why does anyone care? Shouldn’t motherhood be all the badge of honor we need? If you think so, you’re a better person than I because I don’t want to be that person that let themselves go after I had kids. I dedicate so much for my kids, put their lives before mine, give up a kidney in a nano-second for them, but one of the last things I have left is my own, unique, personal style and enjoyment of style. As the only woman in this testosterone laden house, it’s my way of holding on to my femininity and owning something that is all mine. I want it for me. It’s hard to imagine anyone giving this up willingly, so why do they?

Jill Hudson from The Washington Post’s, “Still Me” tells her story in her new column about how moms can stay hip after they’ve forgotten about somebody — themselves:

The idea for this column came earlier this year, a few weeks prior to my 37th birthday. While picking up my kids from pre-school, I caught sight of myself in the reflection of a car window. Staring back was a sleepy woman in a Mommy Uniform: nerdy glasses, no makeup, paint-splattered nurse clogs, saggy jeans and messy hair (”paging Clairol — stat!”). But the ensemble was only a symptom of the real problem. I realized that I hadn’t read a newspaper — my own newspaper, the one that pays my mortgage — or watched the TV news in over a week. I could, however, quote entire pages of dialogue from Disney’s “The Incredibles” and sing the theme songs of every single show appearing between 8 a.m. and 5:30 p.m. on the Noggin cable network.

Jill goes onto tell what Miriam Arond, editor-in-Chief of Child Magazine said about moms who want to be stylish today. (On this site, we call ‘em MILFs of course):

Arond says she’s seen a real shift in the last six to 10 years in how modern women value their mental, physical and social well-being vis-à-vis motherhood. “Parents years ago felt like they were being selfish if they focused on themselves as much as their kids,” she adds. “Now you see that moms are much more open about the fact that they start resenting their kids, their husbands, their work, if they don’t take time out for themselves.

“There’s a stronger feeling of not wanting to give up that part of themselves that they knew before they became moms,” she says.

You don’t have to wear the latest trends or buy expensive accessories. I think all you have to do is care about yourself. Ultimately, I think that shows through no matter what you’re wearing or what shape you’re in.

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