Comments on: I was a teenage wallflower…not that it matters now, of course.

By: Jenny

Jenny — Tue, 19 Sep 2006 15:26:58 +0000

“My life map is an old map that is useful only to me.”

So perfectly said.

By: TB

TB — Tue, 19 Sep 2006 11:57:21 +0000

You will be the envy of all at the reunion. And I know your boys will learn by your example.

By: Jessica

Jessica — Tue, 19 Sep 2006 00:01:08 +0000

How about offering this to your kids, “Sometimes life is great and sometimes it just blows.”?

No, but seriously, I do think we have to allow our kids their failures and accomplishments because that is the ultimate life lesson. It’s easy to say, hard in practise. I know my heart breaks with every disappointment or cruel lesson my sons learns along the way and part of me wants to circumvent those hard lessons. We expect our children to accept our weaknesses without question, yet we refuse to accept theirs. Every parent wants their child to excel and rationalize thoughts, but that comes with confidence and successes and failures, I think.

I always appreciated the stories my mother told me. She had such a good memory or at least, she had a great imagination and she always had a relate-able story for every situation. I think that is so important.

I know I tend to be overly-realistic with my kids and they’re still young. For example, I might tell my son who just got a C on his spelling test that failing spelling tests will assure him that he will be a broccoli tester for the rest of his life instead of having a playstation in every room when he grows up. Probably not the best form of encouragement, but then again, I don’t know what the hell I’m doing.

By: Ortizzle

Ortizzle — Mon, 18 Sep 2006 23:27:10 +0000

Me again. Excuse all the typos above. It should read “…so that they can have a larger audience *than* we *ever* hoped to have.” I wouldn’t bother, but I hate it when typos are real, legitimate words spelled correctly, just not the ones you wanted to type :-))

By: Ortizzle

Ortizzle — Mon, 18 Sep 2006 23:21:55 +0000

I agree that high school is a lot more complex nowadays, and kids are dealing with a whole new set of variables, so it is hard to give them much perspective. But I think we can give them good old-fashioned advice and support for sure. High school has got some mean wolves out in the woods.

The whole concept of re-inventing themselves as they go through life is one I suppose they just have to live, and when you’re 17, you’re still working on Exhibit A. The Internet and blogs have given kids ways to exhibit Exhibit A so that they can have a larger audience that we every hoped to have. But I still think, in spite of the media savvy they have that we didn’t, that they are going to take just as long to get rid of the training wheels.

Have fun at your 30th! (I never went to a high school reunion, but if I did, I would probably wear a Dracula mask and drink a LOT of margaritas.

By: Amy

Amy — Mon, 18 Sep 2006 13:38:44 +0000

I try very hard to live in the present and that helps me PRESENT things to my kids that way. I remember well that looking at the big picture is something most kids cannot do - so while I offer my sage and eyes-rolled-at advice, I know that a little is seeping in, and that is probably enough for now. Of course you want your kids to benefit from your mistakes and your lessons, and they definitely will, while traversing it on their own as well. Reunions! My 25th is in 2007.